Stuck on the Tarmac: Is Your Next Move Leading for Impact or for Validation?

When I'm traveling to work with a team, nothing disturbs me. Delays, cancellations, whatever. Bring it on, life. We'll find a way. I'm going to be in that room. I love being in that room.

Going home is a different story. Don't slow me down.

Not long ago I was sitting on the tarmac after a weekend retreat with an executive team, and a storm rolled through. The plane was shaking. The line of planes waiting to depart was longer than any I've ever seen.

I'd loved being in the room with those leaders. But now, I was just ready to get home. I'm 48. I like my rhythms.

I wanted a button on my seat I could tap to tell the pilot, let's go.

Here's the part that got me later. If it had been my call, I would've seen a break in the clouds and taken off, and then the next wave of the storm would've rolled in. I'd have put everybody on that plane at risk because I didn't want to sit still.

I think a lot of us live some version of that. Something has ended and the next thing hasn't started, and something in us reaches for a shortcut. Sometimes it's harmless. Sometimes it's a sharp email, or pushing a decision through before it's ready, or saying whatever gets us out of an uncomfortable conversation fastest.

What I keep learning is that it's not really about speed. It's about source. Some of us need to move faster. Some of us need to slow down. Either way, the question underneath is the same one: is this move leading for impact, or leading for validation?

We sat on that tarmac until it was safe to go. Which was exactly right.

Where's your tarmac right now?

The question underneath every shortcut is the one worth naming. Is this move leading for impact, or leading for validation? The Identity Fear Quotient® (IFQ®) identifies which pattern is running you under pressure. Four questions. 15 minutes.

Take the IFQ®